But I Wasn't Yelling!
If you tell someone something more than two or three times, you might as well be yelling at them!
I can remember times where I was told over and over again to do this or that; or to stop doing this or that. I can remember how it drove me crazy inside. Even though the person addressing me was not necessarily yelling at me, it sounded like yelling to me! I think that awareness started somewhere in early adolescence and I’m sure that this is what prompts most young adolescent teenagers and young adults to be defiant and, quite frankly, not very much fun to be around 🙂
I never thought much about myself actually being the person doing the nagging. My wife and I were discussing some issue or a bit of advice that I was giving to one of our boys when she made the statement that she felt like if we told them the same thing more than three times, we might as well be yelling at them. That was the moment that I realized that this was truly the definition of nagging; and I was busted!
This, of course, doesn’t just apply to raising children. In the workplace, I’ve been on the receiving end as well as the giving end of having to telling someone the same thing multiple times. Looking back, I always dreaded being on the giving end as well as the receiving end of these updates.
It would be much more productive to evaluate tasks before you assign them to your team and to have a clear idea of what you actually want to hear rather than simply reminding someone every time you see them to give a status on something that you know is not done or cannot be done.
I thought about that a bit, and she was right. Even though I’m not yelling, the impact might not always reflect that and might provoke a response that is heightened or increased in volume.